Dear Shamansky Real Estate Holdings,
I'm not even sure if you're the actual owner of these apartment buildings because they're so shitty they don't have any name, sign, or webpage. The Auditor's webpage tells me that you are the proud owner of this mark of land that God shat on to create in 1963, so this letter is addressed to you, assuming you are responsible for the maintenance and cleaning work done here.
As you may or may not have noticed, your shitty little apartment complex is totally surrounded by houses. As such you not only need to think about your own jobless / crazy cat lady / sex offender residents, you need to be considerate of everyone else on the street whenever you are doing work that could be considered a disruption.
You know what this morning was? Monday. You know what I was doing at 5:29am?
Okay, now guess what I was doing at 5:30am?
Wait a minute.... that isn't a horde of killer bees... that sounds an awful lot like a snowblower. Maybe if I just wait a minute it'll stop and I can fall back asleep.
So, Shamansky, I got out of bed and went into the guest bedroom to see what could possibly be making so much fucking noise and GUESS WHAT? It was your maintenance team! Scraping the sidewalks and snow-blowing SO LOUD it sounded like you were cleaning out my eardrums.
Now don't get me wrong, I understand that the service you provide here is a totally necessary one, and frankly, I wish someone would come scrape and snow-blow my sidewalks. However, I think maybe you can understand that FIVE THIRTY A.M. might not be the most appropriate time to be performing these services.
In closing, Shamansky, I just want to let you know that I'm going to be making a trip to my local hunting supplies store to pick up a high-powered rifle.
<3 Cake Betch